It’s my birthday! To celebrate me turning 22, here are 22 self-care tips that I’ve learned over the years thus far!
1. Your Happiness is the Only Thing Worth Fighting For In This Life
At the end of the day, what it all comes down to is your happiness is only that matters in this world. You are in charge of your own happiness and don’t let anyone or anything stand in your way of that.
2. You Are Not Going To Please Everyone and That’s Okay
Growing up, I always thought that to be liked by people and to be accepted by others I had to please everyone. You can’t make everyone happy because someone will always feel displeased no matter what you do. I’ve realized that you can’t sacrifice the values and morals that make you who you are to please everyone. There are people out there that will like and accept you as you are and will help you grow into the best person you want to be.
3. You Can’t Truly Love Someone Until You Love Yourself First
Self-love is where it’s at. When it comes to love and relationships, I have learned that if you don’t love who you are as a person, then how in the world are you going o love someone else. You have to be confident in who you are and embrace all that is you. When you do, your significant other will see it and love you because you don’t need their validation (although it is nice to hear) or anyone else for that matter to know that you are loved.
4. In Any Relationship, You Must Compromise
If there is ever a disagreement with between you and someone else, whether it be with friends, family, co-workers, classmates, etc. , there has to be some sort of compromise for there to be a win-win outcome. Find a common medium that you both are comfortable with.
5. Use Makeup To Enhance Your Beauty But Makeup Isn’t A Requirement To Be Beautiful
Oh lordy, if I could go on about my relationship with makeup, we’d be here all day. But that is for another post. My journey using makeup is still ongoing. I’ve learned that when it comes to wearing makeup, do what makes you exuberate confidence. From going full on pancake to not a single inch of makeup, both have made me feel confident in my skin and that’s all that really matters in the end.
6. Be Assertive But Calm and Respectful
This past year continuing into this year, standing up for myself has been easier said than done. I’ve always thought that being nice all the time was the way to go. But people have taken advantage of my niceness and thought it of as weak. When it comes to being assertive, I’m learning to be calm and respectful of the person all while standing my ground instead of having an attitude.
7. Kill People With Kindness
If I had a dollar for every time I’ve been told to kill people with kindness, I could travel the world. I’m not sure if I’m the only one who feels this way but it always seems to kill me first. But it’s been proven to be effective.
8. Communication is Key! People Aren’t Mind Readers
When you meet me for the first time or if you ask people who know me, you’ll find out that I am a Chatty Cathy. I talk. A lot. And at times, I talk fast. But when I’m having a conversation with someone who isn’t as talkative as me, or if there is a lack of communication between two people, I have found it best to be open and honest when communicating. Asking questions helps too! No one is a mind reader, not anyone that I know at least. So unless you tell people what is going on, or what the real issue is, people don’t know how to contribute.
9. True Friends Will Always Find Their Way Back To Each Other
Throughout the years I’ve been in college, I’ve gained an amazing group of friends. Many have them have now graduated and moved away so I haven’t been able to see or talk to them as much as I did before. But there are times in life that will bring us all together no matter where we are and no matter what time of the day it is. It can be celebratory (like celebrating a job promotion or a birthday) or it can be a time of sadness (like whenever one of us is feeling down and in need of cheering up). True friends will find their way back to one another because once we meet we’re stuck with each other.
10. Nobody Can’t Help Someone Who Doesn’t Want To Help Themselves
I am known to be stubborn as a bull. But when it comes time to ask for help, I let my pride get in the way sometimes. I’ve learned that it is only when you have humility, will people help you. Because they won’t help if you feel like you don’t want or need that help. It would be a waste of time and energy on both parties.
11. Mother Knows Best
Groan if you want. But you all know it’s true. Now, at 22, I’ve accepted the fact that yes, mother knows best and she’s always right. Okay, maybe not always but 98% she is. She’ll let me make my own decisions, knowing full well that it sometimes isn’t my greatest decision. When I fall or fail, which is almost a given when it comes to bad ideas, she’ll pick me up, say “I told you so”, help me find a solution and turn the poor decision into a learning lesson.
12. Going A Little Out Of Your Comfort Zone Will Not Kill You
I’ve been so safe in the decisions that I’ve made thus far in life that I feel the need to explore the world that is out of the box I created for myself. I’m not saying that I’m going to do anything extreme like jumping out of a plane anytime soon. What I am saying is that doing small things that are out of the ordinary for me could be good for me and help me become more adventurous.
When you smile, your environment will emit positive energy to you and to those around you.
“If you smile through your fear and sorrow/smile and maybe tomorrow/you’ll see the sun come shining through for you/You’ll find that life is still worthwhile/if you just smile” – Smile by Charlie Chaplin
14. You Are Your Own Person
Don’t change yourself to become someone else. I’ve learned that it takes a long time to find out who you are. You are your own person and you know yourself better than anyone.
15. Trust Your Gut
There’s always this debate between your gut instinct and your brain on what the right thing to do in a given situation isThe gut is almost always right. We may not know why it’s right at the moment but when we look back, the answer is clear as day.
16. Pick And Choose Your Battles
Not every battle is worth fighting. Sometimes you just gotta let it go and move on. Some battles are not even worth a breath or an ounce of your energy that you could use toward something positive.
17. Naps Are Your Best Friend
Right now, it’s the week before final exams which means that there are a lot of all-nighters and means little sleep for me. Naps have been one of my saving graces throughout late nights. It keeps me energized for my next task whenever I feel like the lack of sleep is getting to me. I used to hate them as a kid but now I live for them.
18. Actions Speak Louder Than Words
Ever heard the saying, “You can talk the talk, but you gotta walk the walk”? People, including myself, can talk a lot. But when they put those words into actions, that is when it becomes impactful and it’s also when people take you seriously.
19. Embrace Your Imperfections
No one is perfect. Sometimes we like to think we are but we’re not. There are times that we think that we have more flaws and imperfections than others. Don’t think of them as imperfections, instead think of them as aspects that make you a unique individual.
20. Life Is Like A Box Of Chocolates. You Never Know What You’re Gonna Get
Thank you, Forrest Gump, for that life lesson. I feel like my life thus far has been moments full of trial and error. I don’t always know 100% of the time what will happen next. But that’s life in a nutshell. Okay, no more food references. I’m starting to get hungry.
21. Unplugging is A Blessing In Disguise
My phone is my life in the palm of my hands. But there is more to life than just the tiny screen. Unplugging even just for a few hours is a blessing in disguise because it opens up your eyes to the world. Facebook, Instagram, and SnaoChat will always be there but the experiences and the stories that come from actually living will be gone before you know it. We have one life to live. That’s it. Make the most of it.
22. Wake Up Every Day With A Blank Slate
Each day is an opportunity to start anew. When I wake up in each morning, I use it as a blank slate because I can’t change what happened yesterday because it’s in the past. What I can do is make the most of the day I have today.